The Babymakers (2012)

The BabymakersRelease Date: August 24, 2012

Director: Jay Chandrasekhar

Stars: Paul Schneider, Olivia Munn, Kevin Heffernan

Runtime: 95 min

Everyone likes a good comedy that doesn’t make them think every once in awhile, right? I call them brain vacations. I love them as much as the next guy – but the keyword is a good comedy. A good comedy, THE BABYMAKERS is not.

The movie follows Tommy (Paul Schneider), a man who cannot impregnate his wife. (His sperm has fallen and it can’t get up.) He decides to enlist the help of his buddies to steal some sperm he donated a few years ago.

From the get go, I should have known this would be a tedious experience for me. I guess I was blinded by my love for the Broken Lizard crew – and their involvement in any project. They’re only slightly involved, here. They don’t have a hand in the writing. Jay Chandrasekhar directs and helps produce; Kevin Heffernan helps produce, and he is one of the supporting actors. Oscar-winning Nat Faxon brings in a supporting turn, as well – and while he isn’t part of the main Broken Lizard crew, he often shows up in their movies. He was that one villain in BEERFEST with the horrid German accent. Like that narrows it down, right? And yes, you did read *Oscar-winning* correctly; he won it for co-writing the screenplay for THE DESCENDANTS, alongside Alexander Payne and the Dean on TV’s COMMUNITY, Jim Rash. (He’s actually a talented writer – and I’m quite excited for Faxon & Rash’s co-directorial debut, THE WAY, WAY BACK.) Anyway, as much as I love the Broken Lizard movies, this movie isn’t good. It seriously needs their writing.

I think I laughed a total of four or five times. The Jehova’s Witness scene feels like a very honest portrayal of their interruptions of everyday activities. The humour is shallow, and it’s mostly just a movie younger boys might enjoy. I think this movie might have worked a lot better if the whole Broken Lizard crew came aboard – but that might not even help. Chandrasekhar and Heffernan weren’t able to make me laugh a lot because of its predictable humour, inane plotting and poor writing. One of the stupidest things about the movie is the robbery itself. Honestly… If one robs a sperm bank and only takes one vial of sperm; who might the prime suspect be? Gee, I don’t know… I also don’t think Paul Schneider is a likeable enough lead to carry this film well. Nor is he very funny. He might be good in other movies, but based on what I’ve seen of him so far, I’m not impressed.

This movie just falls flat on its unfunny face. There’s an evident plot, but it isn’t a particularly good one. It’s a very stupid heist movie. You probably haven’t heard of this, but if you have, just take it off your watchlist. It’s a colossal waste of time. By the end of it all, you really just won’t care any more if they have a baby or not. The sexy Olivia Munn can’t even save this. Nor those cantaloupes. (Not her boobs. There’s a running joke of cantaloupes on a magazine cover getting everyone horny.)

30/100

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2 Responses to The Babymakers (2012)

  1. CMrok93 says:

    Nice review Dan. Worst movie of 2012 for me. The end.

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