Movie 43 (2013)

Movie 43Movie 43

Release Date: January 25, 2013

Directors: Elizabeth Banks, Steven Brill, Peter Farrelly (and 10 others)

Stars: Liev Schreiber, Emma, Stone, Richard Gere

Runtime: 94 min

I just watched a version online, and I believe it was the version released in the U.K.; it’s an alternate plot to the U.S. version that doesn’t have Dennis Quaid pitching crazy ideas to a studio. I was not going to spend money on this.

Movie 43 is a haphazardly edited sketch comedy that stars as many A-list actors (including Emma Stone, Richard Gere, Kate Bosworth, Liev Schreiber, Naomi Watts, Justin Long, Kristen Bell, and Elizabeth Banks, to name a few) as the filmmakers could convince that this movie would be lots of fun to make. Charles Wessler achieves his vision: A satire that brings up common issues in the most offensive of ways, and it is the most outrageous comedy ever made.

But it is also one awful movie. If only his passion project (an idea that he’s had for over a decade) wasn’t so silly. Saturday Night Live has okay sketches, good sketches and those rare great sketches. This, however, has awful sketches, bad sketches, and just tolerable, but kind-of funny sketches. Even if you do laugh at some points, it doesn’t stop this from being one bad, bad film. This is still sort-of imaginative and quite original, and unlike anything you’ve seen at the movie theatre before. It’s one of those times where too many cooks in the kitchen (13 directors, a huge cast, 30 writers) really spoils the broth. Apparently, it takes thirteen directors, 102 credited cast members and thirty writers to make a really bad film.

The plot follows three adolescent boys who are searching the depths of the internet for Movie 43, the world’s most banned feature. The two older teens who tell a younger brother, the incredibly irritating Baxter who looks like he’s really ten years old, about Movie 43 are really just making it up because they want some April Fool’s revenge. Little do they know is that the video could very well end the world, somehow.

That makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, nor is it explained. It’s completely random and idiotic. This backstory manages to be worse than some of the comedy sketches, to a point where you might actually want to see another bad sketch. This is because the actors in the background story have little to no charisma, and they’re increasingly annoying and bland.

While the idea of sketch comedies in movies is fairly new, this is still trash. The plot is almost as disorganized as every spoof movie out there. If this is compared to Scary Movie 5, this might as well be an Oscar contender. This is definitely not for the easily offended. The humour is thoroughly crude, offensive, absurd, violent, vulgar, inane, insane, sophomoric and rarely funny; but it’s ironic that I’ve seen a lot more nudity in less offensive films. So… Humour that will offend almost the entire world is okay, but extreme nudity is off the table? Hmm.

Out of the movie’s thirteen comedy sketches, there are thirteen stupid and fairly offensive ones. The one with Terrence Howard is hardly funny at all. The sketch showing that people get much too angry with machines and it upsets the kids inside the machines is incredibly stupid, but it’s creative. There are arguably five tolerable ones, but there are none that provide consistent laughs. The ‘Super Hero Dating’ segment with Jason Sudeikis and Justin Long has a few solid jokes, and it’s an imaginative look into the culture of super hero impersonators. It’s the movie’s strongest segment (even if it’s hardly great). The ‘Happy Birthday’ segment with Seann William Scott and Johnny Knoxville also has some good laughs (albeit forgettable), but it is one of the movie’s more violent and vulgar segments. The ‘Truth or Dare’ segment starring Stephen Merchant and Halle Berry is funny in the beginning, but it progressively gets worse until it falls on its face. Suffice to say, the ‘Happy Birthday’ and ‘Super Hero Dating’ sketches are my favourite, and they are somewhat entertaining.

SPOILERS FOLLOW IN THIS FUNNY PARAGRAPH, I briefly describe the film’s worst three sketches. It seems as if the movie is designed to have the worst three sketches at the beginning of the film. The first sketch has Hugh Jackman sporting a pair of testicles under his chin and it is unfunny and unwatchable. It’s a one-joke sketch where it seems as if Kate Winslet’s character is the only one to notice the prominent nuts. Though, it does show that society cannot help but judge someone for the way they look. The second sketch features Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts homeschooling their child and mercilessly bullying him to a point where he will definitely need to be institutionalized. The third sketch features Anna Farris requesting Chris Pratt to poop on her (you read that right) because it’s apparently a big step in a relationship. Apparently, it’s okay to poop on women, but it’s frowned upon to sh*t on them. Because if you shit on a gal, it’s deemed very offensive. (Read the next part very sarcastically.) Wow. This is the world of my dreams. I’ve always wanted to live in a world where the norm is to poop on women and have a pair of testicles dangling under my chin. Oh, someone, take me there! I can’t take this society where women bitch about me even farting in their general direction! END OF SPOILERS.

Alas, this movie is awful. (But, I am able to use the word ‘alas’ in one of my reviews.) I’ve seen much worse, but it’s really, really, really, stupid. The laughs are forgettable; but it’s the disturbing sketches that are unforgettable. Much to my dismay, this stuff kind-of just sticks with you… Forever.

30/100

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Wreck-It Ralph (2012)

Wreck-It Ralph

Release Date: November 2, 2012

Director: Rich Moore

Stars (voices): John C. Reilly, Jack McBrayer, Jane Lynch

Runtime: 109 min

Tagline: When the game is over, a new world comes to life.

Wreck-It Ralph has one film aspect thing we are always searching for: nostalgia. Nostalgia is when you look back at some point in your life, and cherish that solitary memory. In the case of this great Disney animation film, we find ourselves looking back to our childhoods, when we would spend tireless hours playing Super Mario Bros. to take Princess Peach back from that spiky-backed Bowser or; controlling Donkey Kong to jump over those pesky barrels; or making Pacman run away from those ghosts. This nostalgia is most prominent for those 80s and 90s children. In Wreck-It Ralph, it truly shines through. In animation, this great feeling has not been shown so clearly as it has been here.

In other 2012 films, like The Perks of Being a Wallflower, the nostalgia feeling was looking back at the good times of high school (for my case, early high school, since this is my graduating year) or those generally depressing and lonely times. We’ve seen that in plenty of teen films before it, so it’s a traditional nostalgic feeling in our hearts. With Wreck-It Ralph, it feels truly original because a great video game tribute has never been paid quite like this one, besides documentaries like Special When Lit that rediscovers the long lost game of Pinball.

The story follows Ralph (voiced by John C. Reilly) the villain of a 30-year old arcade game called Fix-It Felix Jr., where Ralph wrecks it and Felix (voiced by Jack McBrayer) races the clock to fix what Ralph has wrecked. Ralph feels like an outcast in his own game, because he lives in a dump across the way from his video game co-workers, while they hang out in the penthouse and party it up. Ralph sets out for different games, that ultimately wreaks havoc in his arcade, in search of a medal so he can redeem himself, and become the hero he has always wanted to be. He eventually ends up at Sugar Rush and meets the charismatic Vanellope (voiced by Sarah Silverman) a computer glitch in her own game. The two outcasts team up together, to defeat antagonists, and make names for themselves.

The main antagonist is the charismatic dictator of Sugar Rush, King Candy (voiced by Alan Tudyk). The other antagonists are from some games Ralph encounters, that find their way into the game of Sugar Rush. Also, there is the arcade manager, Mr. Litwak, who proposes the overbearing threat of pulling the plug of Ralph’s game if Ralph and Felix can’t get back to the game in time. This has the tendency to make the film slightly crowded, but it still is unarguably enjoyable and fun. A few things that make the film fun are the great and often delicious appearing set designs, very seemingly fun arcade games, and the stunningly beautiful [3D] visual effects. The humour is often hysterical, and very funny even for those who are not children. Although, if one is over the age of thirteen, they may think the toilet humour has the huge tendency to be obnoxious and over the top. Those toilet humour jokes are quite hit-and-miss, but most do indeed hit. To add to the general comedy of the film, there are also some exciting action sequences, like the races that made me want to play a good old game of Mario Kart. There is one sequence near the end of the film that features a creature that may just be a little too mature or frightening for a basic children’s film; it reminded me of Pennywise the Clown from Stephen King’s It (at the least the bottom half of it).

The message present (don’t be afraid to be a hero) is great and does not feel forced. What does feel forced, however, are some of the relationships. The one relationship between Felix and Calhoun (voiced by Jane Lynch), feels forced because they just seem so opposite. The relationship between Ralph and Vanellope, on the other hand, was absolutely precious, often heartwarming (and at times heartbreaking), natural and inspiring. It’s normal that this relationship may mend together well, because Ralph’s towering build, that may remind viewers of Donkey Kong, and then Vanellope’s figure that looks like a miniature Princess Daisy, seems like a father-daughter relationship. Instead, it feels like a real, non-condescending friendship. Not to mention, they are both great characters. Vanellope is absolutely adorable and hysterical, and one cannot help but smile when she comes on-screen. She just offers a needed supporting structure to the general film. These characters, and all others, do great jobs of portraying emotions, even though that isn’t hard to do with animation, but regardless, the viewer still feels what they feel – from inspiration, to loneliness, to excitement, to heartbreak. The characters are each well put together, and have nice backgrounds.

Wreck-It Ralph is the finest 2012 animated feature, (but there isn’t any competition, because surprisingly to me, it’s the only 2012 released animated feauture I’ve seen) and is generally one of the finest and most original of 2012. The only thing I thought of with the coming to life at night is the two Night at the Museum films (and more obviously the Toy Story trilogy), but comparing this to that isn’t exactly fair since they are so different. Disney has delivered us a great film yet again, and mashed two generally loved things together: their acclaimed animation, and video games. I had high expectations for this film, and this really rocked my world.

88/100